Wedding Gag wasn't Cool!

The wedding was so quiet, not even the church mouse was stirring. Everyone knew the groom was mad as hell so they steered clear all day.


Why was the groom so angry?


Well, let me tell you:


It was common knowledge that Mike and Katrina were often playing gags on each other. It was tit for tat. Mike would play some joke on Katrina, then Katrina would pay him back with something bigger and badder.


It was Katrina’s turn to get Mike back. Apparently, she gave the tuxedo rental company clerk a hundred dollar bill to put some Arthritis ointment in his undershorts.


The ointment had dried in the shorts, so it took a while before Mikes perspiration activated it.


Everyone knew what she had done because Katrina had it typed in small print on the wedding programs.


While in front of the preacher, Mike was shifting uneasily from side to side, and after about 10 minutes his face began to turn red.


As he recited his vows, Katrina looked at him sheepishly, and when they were through and after they kissed, Mike burst out, “K, I’m going to get you!” And he chased her down the isle to the limo.

"Spring" Wedding Marriage Proposal

From F. Hopkins of Louisiana.

This story involves a frog, water, and spring.

I knew she wanted to get married, but I kept putting it off. Then she threatened to break up so I decided she was going to have to work for her proposal.

It was February 14, 2009 when I popped the question. Let me tell you how I did it.

It was first thing in the morning when she gave me my Valentine’s gift; a box of chocolates. I told her then that she’d get her gift later.

That evening she was pressing me for her gift, and he kept asking me about it. Finally, I gave in. I sat her in the living room chair, saying, “I’ll be right back”.

I went to the garage, picked up the shoebox, went to the kitchen, got a glass of water, a pen, and a calendar.


I set the stuff down on the coffee table and asked, “what do each of these have in common”? I flipped the calendar to April, and I pulled a document from my pocket.


She watched me, then said, “what?”


I said, “Open the shoebox..”
She put the box on her lap, removed the lid, and right on queue, a frog sprang out. She jumped to her feat with a yell.. She said, “I’m gonna kill you!”


I said, “You aren’t done yet. What do these things have in common? After a minute, I asked, “give up?”


She didn’t answer. I said, “They all have the word ‘spring’ in common. The frog springs, the pen has a spring in it, the water came from a spring, and the calendar is opened to the spring season.

She asked, “Spring?” Her eyes were wide with wonder as I handed her the document while reaching into my other pocket.

She unfolded the document, and I waited; watching here face for signs of comprehension. When she started looking up I saw she understood. “A Spring Wedding?” She asked tearfully. I went to one knee, and took her hand. I said, “if you’ll have me. Will you?” I asked.

She started jumping up and down. “Yes… Yes…Yes. I will marry you!”